The MBoard

*megaman finishes torching the hell out of plant man who is burnt, sizzling and robo-dead)
megaman: oh yeah thats how i like my weeds, i like them smoked.

Protoman: PPFFFTTT HAAHahahHahahaha do u even no what u JUST said???

Reply if you "got it" don't reply if you haven't read it yet

---

Should i report this to the mods its a bit risqué

Abe?

...I'm 12 and what is this?

I can't read.

Rez, the topic contains the word MATURE..... I am not responsible for the loss of your innoncence... Kid

Novaman i know you said you cannot read but that does not mean THAT YOU ARE BLIND. Its written like RIGHT there not to post unless youve read the joke which you did not.

I'm so sorry but I don't understand.

Sigh

Look just use your eyes to interpret these groupings of glyphs which are called words into meaningful information.

Oh, now all those weird symbols makes sense!

I don't get it. Why would Mega Man burn his weeds with fire? His house could burn down.

...keeping the place open was a mistake.

Novaman, seriously. Basic canon. Mega Man doesn't fight in his own dang house. That's where his things are, like his helmet and Dr. light.

Rezinald. You be nice now, you hear me? You catch more flies with honey than you do with that sour attitude.

If my attitude wasn't sour I wouldn't have one.

A sourless Rez is still plenty salty and bitter.

*dramatic bugs bunny kiss* *flees*

What if Wily made an entire dungeon out of spikes.

 :o

He'd have to be awfully rich because spikes (at the time this post was made) are quite expensive. Remember that death spikes have a tip so fine they can cleft electrons from their atoms

Render a man's flesh to bubbles in a millisecond they do

What if doctor wily just made a robot master's armor out of Met hats

They're only indestructible if they have a destructible part that peeks out every 5 seconds.

Yeah they're just regular hard hats. Come on this is basic biology, WW!

What if Plant man was actually a nuclear plant instead of a flower?
What if Protoman was Proctoman (short for proctology man, obvs)?
What if Doctor whywee built an evil megaman to kill megaman?
What if Roll was a double agent, Playing Light and Wily against each other as a punishment for their hubris?
What if Zero knew what he was fighting for?
Why doesn't Light just teleport megaman into the boss chamber?

I hate it when plant means building. Yeah yeah I know they share the same origin, planta, which means foot for some reason. So many times I got my hopes up at the prospect of a power plant being some sort of herb that bestows limitless strength upon those who are worthy (which so far is just me)

Proto, or Proctoman in that case, would probably earn really good, honest money. It ain't clean work, some say it even stinks. Let's hope this robot never becomes repurposed for evil.

Thats been a plot in like every mega man series... Or at least some variant of.

Roll's role would roll roles if a woodchuck would chuck wood.

He wouldn't be such a pissant

Do you know how much thought Wily and his bots put into their lairs? In the year 199X it is a MAJOR faux pas to directly visit someone before successfully traversing their personalized death-gauntlet. Don't be rude.

Who would Roll be a double agent for?

For herself. Independent woman. Stains her own hands with the blood of the slain.

That's not how that works.  Roll is for cute, not murder.

The two are not mutually exclusive. She's moe in the animu sense but also like Moe in the Szyslak sense.

got it

To the mauling tent you go!

Mauling tent.... Wow, Nibbles is getting up on there in age.

Enjoy your gumming, Mike.

That was directed at you planty.  Or should I say, FERTILIZER!

If I go then Mike has to go too!

pleeease with peas and carrots on top?

Are you trying to bribe me?

Of course not.

Oh look, someone left a big plate of delicious okra. I'm just going to step out into the potting shed to freshen up...

That's like trying to bribe a guard with a piece of toilet paper with poop on it.  Why would you think that is ok?

I don't know? I thought you might be interested in more daily mucilage. An extra pound of mucilage a day keeps the medical practitioners at bay AND promotes a healthy, shiny coat.

My coat isn't shiny.

Then take the hint/bribe and eat your damn slimy okra you crazy old coot.

*waving fork to a visibly nonplussed Rez* Now be good and open wide for the airplane! No? Too recent for ya? Open wide for the biplane! Hm? The Wright Flyer? Still no? How about for the nice non-rigid dirigible? No Hindenburg 'splosions for you.

...

Da Vinci's weird conceptual Ornithopter?

(Abe better see this thread. He must reap the crops he has sown.)

If I go then Mike has to go too!

pleeease with peas and carrots on top?

But you are a Mike and there's a "no Mikes allowed" sign that I just put up in front of the mauling tent from a safe distance away.

He's right you know.

It just feels like I spend a disproportionate amount of time in the tent than the others and I just think it would be fair if maybe I had someone come with for emotional support?

It takes a lot from the soul (and flesh) going to the maul tent alone. :(

That's kind of the point...

(Abe better see this thread. He must reap the crops he has sown.)

Are the crops Okra crops?
Are you saying that Abe is responsible for the Okra?

Also Planty, I'm not sure if I'm appeased or appalled by the fact that you're offering Rez plant-based foods. For some reason it seems really sick to me (and not because vegetables are garbage foods that have learned to blackmail our health, forcing us to eat them and to learn liking eating them).   Even if you were to argue that you're offering Rez foods that plants produce to help scatter seeds and produce offspring, i'd still cry bull#####, because I know for certain that Rez doesn't ##### in the woods.  Actually it occurs to me that I don't actually know that as a fact, and that I'm making a lot of assumptions here regarding Rez's bowel movements, which may cause concerns regarding my interest and education regarding Rezzo's defecate... so...

Anyways, You should look at the mauling tent, as I do, as a state of Zen.  One can only obtain true enlightenment when your skin is being pierced by an angry man eating (or in your case plant eating) rabbit.  

Actually that fact (paired with the above fecal obsession of mine) brings up a good point.  Perhaps you're having such a disproportional period of time within the mauling tent as to help Mr. Nibbles (that's his name right?  I can't effing remember) get his daily dose of fiber.  I mean he is a rabbit, most rabbits eat plant flesh... Rez is just caring for his buddy in it's old age.  

I say quit being a jerk and get in that tent.  Show your compassion and allow yourself to get mauled.

I am not an easy man to bribe.

Honestly WW, do you fleshlings weep whenever you serve up a steak? Okra is so far removed from the type of plant that, I, the Snare am. Oh boohoo I'm eating okra. As if. Listen, don't lump all us plants together, that's plain ignorant. Like, your pants, which you best be wearing now, are made from cotton, delicious nourishing chocolate contains cacao. All of these lovely items come from relatives of the precious little okra that you apparently want to kiss and marry.

THINK, MAN.

Some of us "fleshlings" do, in fact, weep whenever ANYONE serves up steak.  They whine whenever people grow the cows that make steaks.  They're basically only capable of empathizing with animals and get really upset that the real monster was MAN all along.

Anyway, all you plants look alike to me. I'm not racist but it's all "long stems" and "pollen tubes" with you things.  It's like: I get it, you want to mate, now please put your flowers away, there's children present.

You know, this brings up a good point.  You gotta really respect Rez for dealing with you, indecent as you are, Your blossom bouncing in his face... as you try to bribe him with slimy, sliced, seed pods. 

Rez lives matter Snare.  You should check your privilege and get in that mauling tent.

Okay first of all and I want to make this abundantly clear to everyone. Flowers themselves are NOT genitalia, okay? Flowers are naught but a collection of highly modified leaf and stem structures. Sure flowers contain the structures that create ovules and pollen but we keep that stuff covered up man. Pollen isn't even plant sperm which y'all skin-havers seem to believe. Pollen just contains sperms. Two sperms to be exact.

Us flowering plants can always pack up our bags and go improve some other planet. We'd be happy to. We'd be happy to leave you all to starve and burn without us. We are the true power that enables your lives after all.

I'll be happy to check your privilege to stay at the mauling tent Winged Warrior.  Oh look!  There's your name, right at the top of the list!  Go right on in!  *putts in with tomatoe stick*

Enjoy!

Jeeze, you try and help a guy convince a sentient flower to go in a tent where a rabbit is sure to destroy several layers of flesh, and this is what I get?

Fine

*is mauled*

See snare it's fi--AUGH!!!!!

Honestly WW, do you fleshlings weep whenever you serve up a steak? Okra is so far removed from the type of plant that, I, the Snare am. Oh boohoo I'm eating okra. As if. Listen, don't lump all us plants together, that's plain ignorant. Like, your pants, which you best be wearing now, are made from cotton, delicious nourishing chocolate contains cacao. All of these lovely items come from relatives of the precious little okra that you apparently want to kiss and marry.

THINK, MAN.

Preach on, my nigella! (I can say that because my great great great great grandmother was a quarter Garidella)

I see someone visited Ancestry.com! 

Yeah, turns out it only costs $274.99 USD a year to become a total narcissistic bore at dinner parties.

At least I share the same taxonomic order as Nigella. *reveals tattoos on teeth that read R A N U N C U L A L E S*

It rhymes with ukeleles.

Stop that, STOP IT.

Revealing my strategically placed tattoos or slowly turning you all into junior botanists? You may pick only one.

I pick plants for breakfast my stout shrubbery.  I'll pick as many as I like.

Pick me and ye shall receive crude opium. Which will net you more jail time than the fact you just murdered a sentient, sapient non-human person.

Really this world.

You don't produce poppy, you produce poopy.  And while that might be really #####ty, it's not illegal.

 ::) très drôle, Rêz.

Papaver goddamn somniferum. Says so right on the envelop from wherefore I done what came from before I was planted.

You came from a packet of sesame seeds we used to make our hamburger buns with.  I'm sorry you had to find out this way.

How artisanal. Never pegged you as the type.

I am the living embodiment of art and culture.

Farts and vulture(being one).

Edit- once again I am merely lashing out because I did not get canadian thanksgiving this year. No headcheese or marrow for poor little Snarey. Not even a spare foot of a pheasant.

I was fed some dish called lasagna instead. Excuse me but this is kitty cat food if I'm to believe the newspaper.

Canadian Thanksgiving isn't even real thanksgiving anyway Snare, so it's ok.  Maybe I'll mail you some turkey on the REAL thanksgiving.  IF you're good.

Hence why I didn't capitalize Thanksgiving or canadian. Most reputable atlases don't even list canada.

I don't care for any thanksgiving, whether American or real.

The food is good.

Of course you don't care for thanksgiving Mikero, you're a ninja so it's in your DNA to become taciturn and all mystical-like whenever there's a crowd.

Unless your whole family consists of ninjas and grandma keeps vanishing into the shadows and not knowing how to get out. Plus dry turkey sucks.

As ninjas they celebrate Katanakka.

I do enjoy the carving bit.

(http://static.nichtlustig.de/comics/full/101205.jpg)

*WORLD NINJA DAY!
** Too bad nobody came.

But there are lots of them there I don't get it?  ??? ??? ???

It's secret ninja humor.

We don't have secrets here White Shadow.

WS is half ninja, so he knows what's up.

WE ALSO DON'T HAVE SECRET CLUBS HERE.

You can go to Mchat like the rest of us.

No SECRET CLUBS? Tell me what a fat lady eats, Rez.

Could it be... Tapas?

Don't body shame, Snare.

What? You know exactly what I'm talking about. Now go eat a burger twig boy, how will you ever birth any young with such feeble hips?

The only things my hips do are shatter when I fall in the shower.

"They called me Mr. Glass"

That's Mr. Glass to you.

Yeah, turns out it only costs $274.99 USD a year to become a total narcissistic bore at dinner parties.

This is possibly my favorite comment of the year.

It must have been a slow year...

I think my logging in some time in September was the largest non-bot and non-Rez source of Mboard activity this year.

Guys lets do a round of MMM awards!

It's probably the largest activity in the last THREE years.  But you don't get to front load ballet box stuff awards my leafy friend.

Oh man. The MMM Awards...I can't remember if I won anything. If I did, I should put that on my LinkedIn profile, right?

It couldn't hurt.

I'd hire you if I saw you had an MMMaward (yeah i parse it like that now. fight me) but I can just imagine the scandal that would break out once the people find out that I too am a bearer of the MMMaward.

"This is an outrage! This is nepotism! We'll have you outta office and outta town by high noon!"

I can even hear the drone of weedwhackers amidst the cries of the crowd.

I'm being hunted. I'm scared. :(

Or worse, some Weed-B-Gone.

The Germinator: "You're mulch!"

Use me as mulch and I poison your crops. With GMOs.

As for the Weed-be-gone, I'm not really at all related to Cannabis and is it like, speciest of me to say I wouldn't weep if those gals were all wiped out? What good are they for anyway? Keeping the wallets of alternative comedians and 24 hour pizza joints full? Helping the sick and dying enjoy peace? 

Like ew

You're the Hero Colorado deserves, Snare.

You also helped ensure Frito-Lay got a constant stream of money from me for Cheetos between 2004-2008.

You put someone's kid through college, Mr. Racer, I'm sure. Incidentally since you just outed yourself as a filthy criminal degenerate reprehensible scum, someone (most likely Jake) who isn't me wants to know the proper amount to tip a dealer. I'm asking for a friend named Jake who isn't me. 15% of your total purchase?

It's usually 10-15 years.

You don't tip the deal in money. If anything, they'll tip you with product to give you a sample. If you were to tip them, I'd recommend a slice or two of pizza or a couple of McDonald's hamburgers.

A COUPLE?! You think $3.50 grows on trees?

Or Snares.  ...or do they....

A COUPLE?! You think $3.50 grows on trees?

Tree-fiddy might.

What is this I don't even...

I know, Xero, I know.

But it brought us all back together! Momentarily at least. It's nice.

Filthy jokes are never nice Snare.

It wasn't filthy and besides protoman has glaucoma.

The two have no relation.

The burning and ingesting of the fumes of certain herbal material is purpotedly claimed to alleviate some of the major symptoms of glaucoma hence why to claim it (the joke) filthy is not fair towards poor Protoman. Have a little heart.

B-but look! Friends! Festivities! Can't you feel the merriment? It's like we're one big happy family again! E-except there's no screaming and yelling and hitting

Wait are we supposed to be hitting on each other?

NO FFS.

I know, Xero, I know.

But it brought us all back together! Momentarily at least. It's nice.

Definitely better than when Lunchebox pretended that Abe died.

He wasn't pretending.  He just came back, but in 2 days instead of 3.  Because he's an over achiever.

That's our Abe! *wipes tear*

I saw so many people logged in yesterday: Mike, Abe, Rez, John, Vinch, SB, Xero, Novaman...

That legitimately makes me happy.

And most of us were almost excited about the news!

I was gonna log in either way!

See, now that Mega Man is back baby! we need to get the forums and website up and running proper again!

"News"? "Back"?

*checks google*

Holy toot I had no idea even. Shucks, I thought that everyone was suddenly pouring in because of me. Like everyone just suddenly stopped what they were doing and remembered ol' Snareypoo and wanted to log in and whisper comforting messages to me electronically something something schizophreniform disorder.

But new Mega Man! And Coney is coming back!

I noticed that too.  And he's a missile launcher now too.

To be honest I still come here because this is the best format for any discussion on the internet and you all made me.

Reddit's upvote downvote system should make it good but it's just a cesspool. Social media is just idiots, some of whom you know and some of whom just pop in to give you a bad day. No matter what you choose, no one wants long-form discussion or posts longer than 100 characters.







MMM is a different world.

AND you can make a cool user avatar and identity!  I utterly HATE Reddit's entire board system.  These BBS things are superior in every way.

(screams in lost innocence) >:(


(edit) I read it as megaman was touching plant man not torching

I utterly HATE Reddit's entire board system.  These BBS things are superior in every way.

Absolutely. The core concept of it is smart; Relevant (and thus, the "best") comments are voted to the top by users, irrelevant/bad comments disappear. It's a grading system that would work great in an honest world, where we don't live.

Usually it's used as an "agree/disagree" button which only encourages group think and brigading. This could be solved if there wasn't a karma-score tied directly to a users account in the first place, but "whatever lol".

Reddit also eschews any and all concepts of design as a way to feign simplicity (which ends up being just a worse UX).

At least it doesn't have an animated gif as the background with New Kids on the Block playing.

(screams in lost innocence) >:(


(edit) I read it as megaman was touching plant man not torching

Yeah that would be terrible. It's not cool to touch someone unless you've both filled out the required documents and signed a waiver. Also don't do drugs. Not even a Halls. I don't want my thread to be the cause of sending souls down the dark path of menthol abuse.

You just don't want people to try to smoke you.

There's only one thing to do with everyone's favorite Robot Mummer: Blaze it and praise it!

BURN TO THE GROUND!