The MBoard

Yes, yes, I know, online tests, who cares, but this is actually smart. Also humbling.

The mental_floss Grammar Quiz (http://mentalfloss.com/quiz/quiz.php?p=1&q=329)

I got a smooth 50%, with help. A blogger (http://tomatonation.com/?p=2379) I look up to scored 40%.  You try.

Star Spiritgate (8:14:01 PM): huh, apparently "(SPOILER)" is correct
Star Spiritgate (8:14:04 PM): I overthought that one
Import Justice (8:14:16 PM): huh
lumi colada (8:14:16 PM): hey no spoilers
Import Justice (8:14:18 PM): oh mans
lumi colada (8:14:21 PM): i'm ON that question XD
Star Spiritgate (8:14:26 PM): oh
Star Spiritgate (8:14:30 PM): whoop

lumi colada (8:16:19 PM): AHAHAHA
lumi colada (8:16:24 PM): I got ONE OUT OF TEN on that test
Import Justice (8:16:26 PM): what's so funny?
Star Spiritgate (8:16:27 PM): LOL
Import Justice (8:16:28 PM): :O :O :O
lumi colada (8:16:30 PM): guess which one I got right
lumi colada (8:16:32 PM): go on guess

I got.... 10%...

I really should start going to school  :'(

30%

Then again, I didn't even read the questions, I just chose random options, XD.

20%
The hell?

10%

Most of this is outdated language, since English, like any other active language, is dynamic and ever changing.

I used to know most of this, but I honestly couldn't care less about WHAT things are. That part of grammar was always dreadfully boring to me.

40%. Ugh.

You freaking genius.

I sat on the "to boldly go where no man has gone before" one for quite a while before deciding I was right.

And I was.

70%

I had a borderline-fascist English 12 teacher.

You should not know that.
That's scary.

Which ones did you get wrong?

I didn't know what the hell the subjunctive mood was in the first place, so I got that one wrong, as well as 'to boldly go' and 'A's and Bs,' which I really should have gotten right, but whatever.

Score: 60% (6 out of 10)

70%.

I had to think back a few times to get myself to actually dissect the phrase instead of just going by what I think sounds right. Good quiz, I just wish it didn't take your first click/answer right away and move on, because in a quiz I often have choose my answer a few times before committing to a choice.

... 30%...

I has got an hundred percents.

Unreal.

i do later

i bet u did it but u got 1^ an u just dont wantt o say it u liar

My parents were English majors.

My father was.
Doesn't make much difference.

My mothers a red neck.

My uncle/dad/cousin/dog works for Capcom!

im a beta tester at for capcom

I AM CAPCOM

ty 4 megaman

ur welcom  8)

ps. buy my stuff

I'm suing Capcom.
I AM a cashcow.
They milked me until my teets bled then sucked the rest out with a syringe then starting using my excretement instead of my delicious milk cash....

Milk cash does not sound delicious.

You think you're the first? Say hello to the people at the slaughter house.

Anybody up for some Capcom burgers? Our newest way to bring in the cas- satisfy our fans!

I am Legend.

I am Iron Man.

I am whatever you say I am.
If I wasn't, then why would I say I am?
In the paper, the news, everyday I am.
Radio won't even play my jam.

'Cause I am whatever you say I am.
If I wasn't, then why would I say I am?
In the paper, the news, everyday I am.
I don't know it's just the way I am.

I am Sam
Sam I am
Do you like green eggs and ham?

I do not like Green Eggs and Ham.
I do not like them Sam I am.

Green Eggs and Ham is an elaborate metaphor for homosexuality.

....Oh wow.  That just completely changed the way I look at that story.

Green Eggs and Ham is an elaborate metaphor for homosexuality.

My life is warped.

Oh god.

I don't know if you made that book better or worse for me.

Would you do it in a box?

Would you do it with a fox?

That doesn't sound homosexual at all..

Foxy chick in her box? YES PLX

(http://digitalbattle.com/wp-content/uploads/2006/05/Star%20Fox.jpg)

Be careful what you wish for.

THAT IS NO CHICK

Besides, furries are Nova's department, remember?

Foxy chick in her box? YES PLX

I find it odd that you're attracted to women who live inside their own vag.

: Edgecrusher   5 July 2008, 02:02:07

Green Eggs and Ham is an elaborate metaphor for homosexuality.

My life is warped.

Oh god.

I don't know if you made that book better or worse for me.

Worse.

*cackles*

I love my life.

This is the sort of thing I can't just forget. Like Tubgirl and the Holocaust.

30%

Makes me feel kind of stupid really.

10%

##### you English.

THAT IS NO CHICK

Besides, furries are Nova's department, remember?

Go to hell furry lover.

Green eggs and Ham.
Huh.
So THAT'S what they're calling it now?

Here is the entirety of the text of that book.
[spoiler]Green Eggs and Ham
Copyright 1988 Beginner Books

Italic Text - Sam I am
I am Sam
I am Sam
Sam I am

That Sam-I-am!
That Sam-I-am!
I do not like
that Sam-I-am!

Do you like
green eggs and ham?

I do not like them,
Sam-I-am.
I do not like
green eggs and ham.

Would you like them
here or there?

I would not like them
here or there.
I would not like them
anywhere.
I do not like
green eggs and ham.
I do not like them,
Sam-I-am.

Would you like them
in a house?
Would you like them
with a mouse?

I do not like them
in a house.
I do not like them
with a mouse.
I do not like them
here or there.
I do not like them
anywhere.
I do not like green eggs and ham.
I do not like them, Sam-I-am.

Would you eat them
in a box?
Would you eat them
with a fox?

Not in a box.
Not with a fox.
Not in a house.
Not with a mouse.
I would not eat them here or there.
I would not eat them anywhere.
I would not eat green eggs and ham.
I do not like them, Sam-I-am.

Would you? Could you?
In a car?
Eat them! Eat them!
Here they are.

I would not,
could not,
in a car.

You may like them.
You will see.
You may like them
in a tree!

I would not, could not in a tree.
Not in a car! You let me be!

I do not like them in a box.
I do not like them with a fox.
I do not like them in a house.
I do not like them with a mouse.
I do not like them here or there.
I do not like them anywhere.
I do not like gren eggs and ham.
I do not like them, Sam-I-am.

A train! A train!
A train! A train!
Could you, would you,
on a train?

Not on a train! Not in a tree!
Not in a car! Sam! Let me be!

I would not, could not, in a box.
I could not, would not, with a fox.
I will not eat them with a mouse.
I will not eat them in a house.
i will not eat them here or there.
I will not eat them anywhere.
I do not eat green eggs and ham.
I do not like them, Sam-I-am.

Say!
In the dark?
Here in the dark!
Would you, could you, in the dark?

I would not, could not,
in the dark.

Would you, could you,
in the rain?

I would not, could not, in the rain.
Not in the dark. Not on a train.
Not in a car. Not in a tree.
I do not like them, Sam, you see.
Not in a house. Not in a box.
Not with a mouse. Not with a fox.
I will not eat them here or there.
I do not like them anywhere!

You do not like
green eggs and ham?

I do not
like them,
Sam-I-am.

Could you, would you
with a goat?

I would not,
could not,
with a goat!

Would you, could you,
on a boat?

I could not, would not, on a boat.
I will not, will not, with a goat.
I will not eat them in the rain.
I will not eat them on a train.
Not in the dark! Not in a tree!
Not in a car! You let me be!
I do not like them in a box.
I do not like them with a fox.
I will not eat them in a house.
I do not like them with a mouse.
I do not like them here or there.
I do not like them ANYWHERE

I do not like
green eggs
and ham!

I do not like them,
Sam-I-am.

You do not like them.
So you say.
Try them! Try them!
And you may.
Try them and you may, I say.

Sam!
If you will let me be,
I will try them.
You will see.

Say!
I like green eggs and ham!
I do! I like them, Sam-I-am!
And I would eat them in a boat.
And I would eat them with a goat...

And I will eat them in the rain.
And in the dark. And on a train.
And in a car. And in a tree.
They are so good, so good, you see!

So I will eat them in a box.
And I will eat them with a fox.
And I will eat them in a house.
And I will eat them with a mouse.
And I will eat them here and there.
Say! I will eat them ANYWHERE!

I do so like
green eggs and ham!
Thank you!
Thank you,
Sam-I-am!
[/spoiler]

THANK YOU FOR THAT JOHN

You're welcome.

Did you know every word in that book is a single syllable except for anywhere?

and the longest one syllabled word in the English language is "squirreled"

I'd argue that it's two syllables in a thread where you didn't get 100% on a menacing grammar quiz.

Wow.
What a children's book!

I'd argue that it's two syllables in a thread where you didn't get 100% on a menacing grammar quiz.

Technically, it's accepted as both mono- and polysyllabic.

It's hard to find definite proof either way, I did a poem on it.
A Fibonacci poem.
It was fun.

I knew a guy who used to say "supposed" with three syllables. It was annoying.

Sup. Po. Sed. Ew.

How many syllables you should put in 'supposed' depends entirely on the context.

'Supposed to be,' for example, would be two.

'His supposed location,' however, I would say with three syllables.

I know that, but he would use it EVERY time.

"Hey, that's sup-po-sed to go there!"

What a loser.

I had an english teacher who said "Wednesday" with three syllables.

Wed Nes Day

Ugh. And ugh again.

That was probably more an effort to emphasize it's correct spelling.

At least, I hope that's why they did it.

I know you like classic gaming but that's going a bit too far JC.

Clever, Fatso.

That was probably more an effort to emphasize it's correct spelling.

At least, I hope that's why they did it.

Sadly, no.

*dies a little, inside*

That was lame.
Like you were grasping at something and fell 10 feet short.

I had an english teacher who said "Wednesday" with three syllables.

That was probably more an effort to emphasize it's correct spelling.

At least, I hope that's why they did it.

I do that as a joke. To actually say it like that... That is too gross.

I had an English teacher in high school who on the first day I ever met her was writing on the on the board and this happened;

Teach: "... How many o's are in kangaroo?"
[everyone is like "... 2....... >_> <_<"]
Mike: "... But you're an English teacher..."
Teach: "And you're an obnoxious brat."
Mike: "..."

I instantly hated her and never forgave her and was glad she got replaced by one of the best teachers I've ever had.

Clever, Fatso.

...

Sadly, no.

You and your "clever" usage of quotes.

Oh ho ho, I can do it tooooo!

I knew a guy who used to say

Wed Nes Day

And

I

actually say it like

ugh

And

You and your

classic

Ugh

And

Ugh

peanut butter and banana sandwiches

Ugh

Aw-huh

(http://tbn0.google.com/images?q=tbn:R0NSX6I-JwqRKM:http://bp1.blogger.com/_Qy4iftwk5JM/R_0d6mM84KI/AAAAAAAAC68/YcoNPLklJqM/s400/EvilRonald3.jpg)

Ugh

I lol'd.

"Aw-huh" was the best part.

I got a solid 50%, however, some of the questions struck me as incorrect. Mostly, they were little things, like the fact that, "To boldly go where no man has gone before..."  is a sentence fragment, and they set it up as a full sentence, as well as the apostrophes one*. That, and the fact that it was made by a person who hates grammar.


*I was taught that apostrophes are used for two things: possessives and contractions. It will forever be imbued within me that "A's" refers to either "A is..." or "A is the possessor of... ," and never to more than one A.  I'm curious as to when it was and who it was who decided otherwise.

Footnotes in a post! Wowza.

"To boldly go where no man has gone before..."  is a sentence fragment

It's also a split infinitive, which is also generally considered unacceptable.

The A's and Bs thing is a question of style too, though. I've always been taught to figure out one way and stick with it. Switching in the middle of a paper (in the same sentence!) strikes me as sloppy.

Then again, that's not really what the quiz was asking...

It seems very... I guess "sketchy" would be the proper word... to have a quiz relevant to proper grammar, but written with (at times) mediocre grammar.

Footnotes in a post! Wowza.

It wasn't completely relevant to my point, so I added it later, indicating its relevancy via footnotes.

 :3

I'm not gonna bother taking the test 'cause I don't feel like it.

I had an English teacher in high school who on the first day I ever met her was writing on the on the board and this happened;

Teach: "... How many o's are in kangaroo?"
[everyone is like "... 2....... >_> <_<"]
Mike: "... But you're an English teacher..."
Teach: "And you're an obnoxious brat."
Mike: "..."

Kill her.

Oh ho ho, I can do it tooooo!

My gut. Hurts. So much now.

I'm not gonna bother taking the test 'cause I don't feel like it.

: Mikero   7 July 2008, 05:54:23

I had an English teacher in high school who on the first day I ever met her was writing on the on the board and this happened;

Teach: "... How many o's are in kangaroo?"
[everyone is like "... 2....... >_> <_<"]
Mike: "... But you're an English teacher..."
Teach: "And you're an obnoxious brat."
Mike: "..."

Kill her.

I'll do it this afternoooooooooon!