Super Smash Bros. Brawl Discussion Topic

[ASR]

I have contacts, and I used to wear glasses regularly. I ditched them because I was never able to find a comfortable pair, and they always give me headaches.

Plus, I look better without them. I think it was a Seinfeld line: "I go into those eyeglass stores and look at all those pictures on the walls of models wearing glasses and think 'Look how good those people would look if they weren't wearing glasses!'"

I've been seriously considering laser eye surgery and years ago my parents said I could do it when I'm older. So, I might bring it up again.

[preventerWIND]

Scott Summers, age 13.

He got laser eyes for free. What a chump..

And I've seen the laser eye process. All I can say is EEEEEW MY GODDDDD!!! I can't handle anything with eyes, my gross out weakness is eyes..

[Mikero]

And he hated them for most of his life.

[XJ]

Imagine a blind person with laser eyes...

[preventerWIND]

It's not considered murder if you can't seeee!~

[Mikero]

My grossout weakness is eyes too!

BFF!

[XJ]

I'm legally blind, actually. If I don't have contacts in, I think my vision is 20/200 or something.

So I can bring my dog anywhere if I really wanted to piss people off.

"Sir, no dogs allowed."

"I'M BLIND, YOU ASSHOLE!" *hit with cane*

[preventerWIND]

I made the mistake of going to Las Vegas over my Christmas Break when I lost my glasses. I couldn't see a thing. And they had porn. On billboards. NOT COOL.

[XJ]

Um, that's what the internet is for.  Just go ask Rez for some MegaMan goodness to make up for your loss. The secret code word is "cupcake sprinkle." GO.

I know that's two words. GO.

[preventerWIND]

The point is, it was an hilarious experience. And I missed out.

[ASR]

Ha, great story. This was last weekend.

I was swimming in Lake Michigan, and I got out of the water and realized my left contact had fallen out. So I'm like, "Damn, we're out on the boat in the middle of Lake Michigan. I'll have to keep one eye shut or I'll get a headache. This sucks." Then my friend goes, "The contact is stuck on your shoulder!"
What are the chances? I popped it back in my eye and shazam, it was fine for the rest of the day.

[XJ]

The point of the story is to not swim in Lake Michigan. It screws around with you.

[ASR]

It's run by a less-cruel version of Poseidon.

[XJ]

Imagine if the events of Poseidon, the Titanic, and all three Jaws happened to your boat.

You'd be #####ed.

[preventerWIND]

Where the hell do you meet an ice-berg in the middle of #####ing lake Michigan?

[XJ]

I didn't mean for ASR.

I meant that to be like the trailer for a movie.

The #####ed Up Boat

[ASR]

Hollywood Magic, Wind.

[XJ]

It's better than that magic those Canadians use. We know what you're up to, Canada!

[preventerWIND]

Remind me never to visit your magical city of lies ASR.

It's better than that magic those Canadians use. We know what you're up to, Canada!

We have tricks t'make your body disappear. Ask Mike.

[XJ]

Yeah right. I doubt you guys could ma-

[preventerWIND]

.....

CANDLEJACK

LAW-

[ASR]

EDIT: DAMN YOU WIND. I like how I had to put the edit ABOVE.

That's almost as stupid as all that Candlejack nonsense that's been floating arou

[XJ]

But I didn't say anything about Candlejack. I thought we were talking abou

[Vinchenz Rock]

You guys are dumb.

Oh, here's a story similar to ASR's.

I was in Future Shop and I saw a Dell computer for a larger sum of money.

Seriously! Can Dell jack up their prices anymore? It's #####ing anno

[Majikn]

20/200

... The hell?

[Vinchenz Rock]

20/200

... The hell?

I thought that too.

[Fatso]

I'm like 20/90 and can't make out fine details beyond my outstretched hand, so I can imagine his life.

[Majikn]

Hah. Well cue me looking like a moron, because I just looked up what that meant.

This is from the blissfully unaware mind of someone who's never had to wear glasses, so I apologize for the post.

Candlejack.

[XJ]

For the unfortunate readers who don't understand, 20/200 means that objects that are 20 feet away are as blurry as objects 200 feet away to a person with 20/20 vision.

Ironically enough, my goggles friend has 20/10 vision or something, the lucky bastard.

[Mikero]

For a second there I thought that 20/200 business would make one eye perfect and the other one transplanted from Clark Kent. But I got it in the next second.

I remember at my last eye doc exam years ago they said I had 20/19 vision. But also said I had a slight astigmatism in one eye. I must remember one of those wrong.

Ha, great story.

False advertising.

It's run by a less-cruel version of Poseidon.

His name is Karl Finniganlinson. With a K. What kind of #####ing asshole spells Carl with a K? Anyway he was in a drama workshop with me in grade eight. I told him to get bent and go jump in a lake.

Sorry 'bout that.

It's better than that magic those Canadians use. We know what you're up to, Canada!

We have tricks t'make your body disappear. Ask Mike.

Pardon? I was dissapear'd when you said that and I only came back and heard my name.

I was in Future Shop and I saw a Dell computer for a larger sum of money.

Seriously! Can Dell jack up their prices anymore? It's #####ing anno

Once I was in a shop in the future and I saw a bell computer for a future sum of money.

Seriously! A computer with bells all over it. The shell computer was cooler, but that's a WHOLE other bowlful of a story for another time. I think a great disaster happens between now and the future. You'll see I'm right. It's VERY improbably I'm wrong that that will happen.

[ASR]

Can Dell jack

Oh, wow, I just now caught that.

[Fatso]

You don't have to be sad about it, it was semi-cleverly hidden.

[Majikn]

You did a good job, ASR. No need to be so hard on yourself.

I almost said you did a good boy.

For a second there I thought that 20/200 business would make one eye perfect and the other one transplanted from Clark Kent. But I got it in the next second.

I remember at my last eye doc exam years ago they said I had 20/19 vision. But also said I had a slight astigmatism in one eye. I must remember one of those wrong.

I remembered you mentioning that, and also someone else saying to me a long time ago when I mentioned an eye measurement: "I don't have one bad eye and one good eye!" So I thought the same thing.

Also, I KNOW WHO CLARK KENT IS, TOO. *raises hand for high five, then slowly lowers it*

[Mikero]

I know he's an excellent reporter.

>_>
<_<

[Xero]

Stigmata of the eye > Stigmatism of the eye.

[ASR]

I don't think either of them are all that hot.

[Mikero]

What kind of stigmata would get in the eye? I don't remember them doing anything to J-man's eyes.

[Abominator]

He saw me naked and then wept blood for a century.

[ASR]

If you see me naked, you're instantly raptured into whatever heaven you believe in.

[Snare]

gag.

[preventerWIND]

If you see me naked you're probably gay for looking at me naked.

I win.

[Vinchenz Rock]

If you see me naked, you'd turn gay.

But I wouldn't have gay sex.


If you see Mikero naked... well, you'd probably be beheaded before you can see him naked.

[preventerWIND]

V is thinking of Mike naked.

[Vinchenz Rock]

Who wouldn't?

[ASR]

Straight men.

[preventerWIND]

Or women.

OOH BURRRRRNNN!!!!

[Vinchenz Rock]

Straight men.

Ah, damn, I'm engulfed in flames again...

[Mikero]

You guys act like you don't want to see me naked but you keep posting about it. Denial is a slick bitch.

[Vinchenz Rock]

Hey I didn't deny i- *Burns to a crisp*

[Johncarllos]

So I played Brawl at my girlfriend's house for roughly 2 hours tonight.
Her Siblings and cousins were playing too.
I won.
Every time.
Even with a 120% handicap.